Getting Rid of Those Things You Always Wanted

 My "dream" double treadle spinning wheel.  

Since I was a little girl I wanted a spinning wheel with which to spin my own yarn.  I finally got one a few years back.  A beautiful Ashford Traditional with a walnut colored finish.  Promptly, I signed up for beginning spinning classes with a friend at our local fiber guild and began my foray into making yarn.  It was fun, very time consuming work.  My single treadle wheel was lovely to behold, but it wasn't easy to use and I kept getting out of rhythm and breaking my yarn. This got me to dreaming of getting a more modern double treadle spinning wheel where both feet work making it easier to keep in time.  I stalked Craig's List and my local fiber guild for a used version of the model I thought would be just perfect.  Finally, one turned up at a price I could afford and I quickly snatched it up, brought it home and got to work.  It was everything I had hoped it would be and yet spinning yarn was still time consuming work.  Making a skein of yarn took days.  One day to spin each ply (I would make 2 or 3), another day to ply the plies together, another to wind and wash the yarn, and days to wait for it to dry.  Whew!  A lot of time and effort.  As lovely as my skeins of yarn were I sadly found I didn't really like knitting with them.  True, I could spend more time at my new craft of spinning, (I had only been at it for three years) honing my skills to produce yarn I did like knitting, but I found it was not how I wanted to spend my free time.  This realization made me feel really, really guilty having spent so much effort and money on this hobby and it also left me a bit confused.  Why was this not working out as I had planned?  I believe it is because my dream was so much more about an idea than the actual object of a spinning wheel. 

I loved the idea of quietly spinning yarn all day.  It made me think about the slower pace of a life many years ago.  It was idyllic in my mind.  But, since I don't live in that time period, or have the large family to help with all the other chores of everyday life, and that my son is homeschooled, and am often interrupted by the phone, the doorbell or the dog barking, and and.... My dream was in actuality more about that slower pace of a simpler life than it was about spinning yarn.  Purchasing a spinning wheel really only added to my already frenzied full life.  Instead of simplifying I was really cluttering my life with yet another thing to get done.
 
These associations we have around objects I think are the problem.  Like for instance, how I thought purchasing an ice cream making machine was going to make me happy and my family closer.  It sounds truly odd as I write that sentence, but looking back that was really what I thought.  I saw a vision of my family picking raspberries together in our backyard, bringing them in and gathering around the machine as it slowly churned our fresh ingredients into ice cream.  But, this is not what happened.  In reality no one wanted to help me, the neighbor boy ate most of our raspberries so I used frozen cherries instead and when I was finished nobody cared much for the end product.  I was trying to force a family moment in an area only I was interested in.  I didn't consult my husband or son before purchasing an ice cream machine.  I jumped in because I associated making ice cream with hearth and home - probably due to reading too many homesteading blogs.  Our time would have been better spent playing a card game, having a tickling battle or watching a movie together as they are things we all like to do.  Also, none of those things need some specialty kitchen gadget that has only one purpose.

What I'm trying to say is that often we buy something we've always wanted only to be let down in the end.  Our culture tells us in so many ways that buying stuff will make you happy, but the reality is only you can make you happy.  What I've found is that I the more stuff I get rid of the clearer the vision of what I do want emerges.  The "what I want" that has emerged for me is that I want a close family that spends their time together leading a simple slower paced life.  Thus, I'm getting rid of all this extra stuff that I've always wanted and oddly, that purging is going to make me much happier than the stuff ever did.

Hazardous Items Disposal

The many cleaners we need to dispose of as household hazardous waste.

After you go through all the "easy" stuff to giveaway, donate and sell you will start to come across the not so easy items.  Those that need to be washed, slightly fixed, or even those that are toxic. Hazardous waste items that require special disposal is actually a pretty large category nowadays.  Electronics (even including electric toothbrushes and toys), batteries, media items like CD's and ink cartridges, propane cylinders,  paints, solvents, automotive cleaners and fluids, household cleaners, aerosols (even hairspray), fluorescent light bulbs, mercury thermometers, pool chemicals, pesticides, appliances both gas and electric, tires, electrical cords and holiday lights now need to be properly disposed of or recycled .  Most states have household hazardous waste drop off facilities usually organized by what county you live in.  You can find Minnesota's drop-off facilities here.  

Many items can be dropped off for free, but some incur fees like old appliances (gas ones being more expensive than electric), tires, mattresses and TVs.  To avoid this we have had good luck with advertising on Craig's List for "scrappers" who want to come and take our used broken appliances away for their metal.  Usually we will say they are on our driveway and give out our address stating first come first serve.  We've never had to wait more than a day for them to be removed (but of course we live in a large metro area.)  Once we even found a local, really local (just a few blocks away from our house) woman who took old appliances for free for her business which repaired and then resold them.

Another possibility for disposing of hazardous material are libraries. Many have drop-off facilities for batteries in the form of a large garbage cans that look like a battery itself.  Libraries often also have a collection box for used eyeglasses which the Lions Club International recycles.  While not a hazardous waste item, eyeglasses that are an old prescription or style for you can still be used by someone else without the means of buying their own and the Lions Club works at facilitating this exchange.  Your old computers, cell phones, GPS etc. can also be dropped off at your local Best Buy store for proper recycling at no charge to you.  For painting supplies you can sometimes find a reuse center like Habitats for Humanity ReStore.  They have a latex paint recycling program called Mix it Up where they mix together paints based on color, sheen and use (i.e. interior vs. exterior), filter it and resell it.  They of course also take any leftover building supplies, old windows, doors, cabinets, sinks and even working appliances.  Really a great resource for donating.  The more we can keep items in use and out of the landfill the better don't you think?

Revamping Your Hobbies

 My hobby corner of the living room.

I'm a pretty crafty person and find joy in making things myself, but in our war against stuff I found being a serial hobbyist is antithetical.  Thus, I went through all of my hobbies picking out just the two that bring me the most pleasure and scrap the rest along with all their equipment.  The two I picked are knitting and spinning as fiber really is my true passion and not much more than a day goes by where I don't do one or the other.  

Beeswax candle making with all it's melting pots, molds, jars and wicking supplies was one hobby that met the chopping block.  Soap making was another, with it's dedicated stock pot, hand mixer, spoons and vast variety of oils and nut butter ingredients.  I also used to make all our lotions, lip balms, shampoo, beauty masks, sugar scrubs and even toothpaste all of which had lots of left over ingredients and containers to be sold.  Being an Art major from undergraduate and graduate school I accumulated lots of supplies for many different kinds of art making, but after I culled a few things for my son's use I sold the rest which included paints, litho print blocks, inks and tools, drawing supplies, woodworking chisels and gouges, and all of my metalsmithing materials and equipment.  It was very freeing to let go of all these supplies as I'm no longer interested in these pursuits.  I used to play the piano too, and while we have a piano now there will not be room in our next house for it so I have sold my stacks of music books  keeping only four with songs that I still play from once in a blue moon.  When we move I'll give these last books to my father or brother who still play regularly.  

The last to go was sewing and it was a hard one for me.  I've sewn clothing since I was a child, but I really don't have the long stretches of uninterrupted time that I need now that I have a child of my own.  Fabric and patterns were just accumulating on my shelves and I felt guilty over the waste, but thought I would still get to using them.  Well, now I've admitted to myself that even if I had the time I probably would choose knitting or spinning over sewing as they are very relaxing for me where sewing, if I'm truly honest, has always stressed me out.  You see if you cut the fabric wrong you now have scrap fabric as you cannot redo a cut.  Whereas with knitting you can always rip back your knitting, wind up the yarn and start a fresh.  So, I have sold most of the fabric (still have more to do), notions, lots of thread, some tools such as scissors, pinking shears and marking pens, but I do still have my sewing machine, basic thread and sewing needles for patching and making repairs.  I would eventually like to sell the sewing machine, but I'm just not ready.

And I think this is an important thing to note that I did all the above in stages as I couldn't "see" everything that needed to go all at once, but instead getting rid of one hobby made it easier to get rid of the next and so on.  Also, some items are simply harder to let go of then others, but eventually they will go if that's your goal.  I sold almost all of this on Craig's list with the exception of the fabric which I sold on Etsy.  I already had an Etsy shop so it was easy for me, but it may be worth setting up a shop if you have lots of new craft supplies with name brands (most of my fabric I knew the designer's name, company, and name of the pattern) or antiques.  People really do search for specific designer brands on fabric nowadays and I found I got a good price and they sold fairly quickly on Etsy compared to when I tried to sell my fabric and patterns on CL.

Actually, I do have one more hobby I kept, but it only takes up the space of a regular sized shopping bag and it helps me with my downsizing.  Have you guessed it?  It's scrapbooking.  I scrapbook with my friends once a month whittling our photos, child art and mementos down to a book.  I could simply keep all our photos digitally and dump the physical ones, but I find we don't enjoy them that way.  We enjoy looking through our past in the form of a book on a lap sitting close to one another on the couch.  I fit a couple to a few years per scrapbook (or in my case one scrapbook for all my childhood and youth) saving only a few special photos to remember events by.  Again, my hope is to give my son Sam memories, but not weigh him down with the past.

Finding Homes for Unwanted Goods

Our "free" box for putting items out on our curb.  It doesn't blow away!

After you have been selling, gifting and donating for awhile you will begin to come across some things that you don't know how to get rid of except to the dump.  And while the dump is an option, it really is one of last resort and with a little research you can probably find someplace/someone who will except your items.  For instance, if you have hard to get rid of items like used mattresses, large furniture and even TV's there are local charities that specialize in helping people transitioning out of homelessness and poverty set up a household.  Here in the Minneapolis area of Minnesota that organization is Bridging.  You can bring your items to them or they will send a truck, and the muscle to move you items, to you for a fee.  Partially used makeup and beauty products are another hard to dispose of item, but many local women's shelters will gladly except accept this kind of donation.  And don't forget about using old standbys like Craig's List or Freecycle as both are free online sites to list your items to give away to other individuals.  Also, if you live on a busy street you can always just put items on the curb with a free sign on it.  Once when we were bringing items to the curb from our garage (which is at the back of our house on an alley) the previous items disappeared by the time we walked to the garage and back.  Now that's instant gratification for you!

Another, great way to dispose of unwanted stuff and even make a little extra money is to sell any used scrap metal and even fine metal items you don't need anymore.  I used to be a metalsmith artist years ago and had lots of left over copper and even though it was a small amount of only 10 pounds my local scrapyard happily took it and gave me a check to boot!  My husband has repaired computers for years and has a huge stash of cords that contain guess what?  Lots of copper!  Now he is also off to the scrapyard to recycle and make some spare change.  I'm not too sentimental a person so I have even sold old jewelry and christening gifts that were made of precious metals such as silver, gold or platinum to a local shop in my area for cash.  It may sound a bit harsh to get rid of a christening cup in this manner, but I think of it as one less memento my son will have to deal with after I'm gone.  This truly is my thought process as I filter through all our stuff  - "What use will this be to Sam?"  Does he really need a large tub of all my childhood photos, drawings and treasures?  Or, would a single scrapbook be a better way to remember his mom?  Maybe it's a morbid outlook, but with my mom being a hoarder I often think of all her stuff that will one day be my stuff whether I want it to be or not.  Paring down all our belongings, especially those of sentimental value I like to think of as a future gift to my son.  I want to give him memories of the past, but not weigh him down with it. 

Donating to Charity

 My latest batch of items for donation.

Sometimes in my quest to rid our house of clutter I come to a point where I just don't want to deal with selling items, I want things gone and fast!  This is usually when I start bagging up items to donate to charity.  Making money from our unwanted stuff for us is pretty necessary so we can afford to fix up our current house to put it on the market, but selling can be a slow process and sometimes you just need to keep the momentum moving.  Donating can give you money though in the form of a tax deduction and it's nothing to sneeze at I assure you.  If you're diligent about recording what you donate it's pretty simple come tax time to plug in all those itemized deductions.  A single pair of women's pants can be worth anything from $4 - $12, depending on quality, come tax time.  Even if you just track your donations as a bag of clothing or household items you can still deduct something like $25 per bag on your taxes.

Donating to charities has really never been easier now that they will come right to your door and pick up from you directly, and you don't even have to be home!  The three I use most frequently are Vietnam Vets, Lupus and Courage Center, but there are many to choose from depending on where you live.  You can usually set up a pickup online or by calling to find out when they will be in your area.  If I'm really in a hurry to unload stuff, as sometimes you need to wait a few weeks for a pickup, I drive to my local Goodwill and drop off my items with them.

Lastly, another great option for donating used goods, if you are doing your clearing out during the summer months, are churches who will except donations for their annual rummage sales.  We have one in our area whose rummage sale is quite huge and they except just about anything.

Staying Motivated

Can you see our love for tubs in an effort to organize/hide all our stuff?

The tricky thing about getting rid of clutter for me is motivation.  I'll have good days where I feel I've accomplished a lot towards our goal of owning less things - numerous postings on Craig's List, bags ready and waiting for a charity pickup, closets that have been thinned out and reorganized.  But then there are those days where I look around and feel completely overwhelmed by the task at hand.  How will I ever get rid of everything in the basement?  We're planning on building our small house without a basement because of expense and because basements are great collectors of stuff.  Don't know what to do with something "Oh, just put it in the basement." you'll say until that basement becomes so full and you'll wonder what happened.  Now, I finally have to deal with all those things that got stored away down there because we didn't want to deal with them at the time.

So back to figuring out how to stay motivated.  What I do is figure out what I can do to contribute to our goal each day, but not how much I will contribute.  Meaning anything that I do to get rid of stuff is good and is enough for that day no matter how small of an action I take.  This may seem like a minor point and I didn't really get how much the distinction matters for years, but finally it clicked.  If you say "I'm going to clean out this closet today." you've set yourself a expectation of completing your task and if you don't, and let's face it stuff does happen to take you away from your task, you end up feeling disappointed in yourself.  To change it around I now say "I'm going to work on cleaning out that closet today." I've still set an expectation of cleaning out the closet but not how much I expect to get done.  See, even if I spend as little as 5 minutes working on sorting out that closet I've accomplished what I set out to do and thus feel better about myself. This distinction between what and how much is something I learned from my husband.  He would never commit to getting a project done in a certain amount of time because he knows you can't know what is going to happen along the way so why set yourself up.  Honestly, I used to find it maddening until I realized he didn't get as stressed, frustrated or worked up as I did when working on house projects and wouldn't I be better off not feeling those emotions?

I try not to take days off from downsizing either as they usually make me feel guilty and degrade my motivation.  There are days I just don't have it in me to tackle some areas of our house, but I try to find something, anything really, so that at the end of the day I can feel I contributed to our goal.  If the basement is too scary, and let's face it it often is, I'll clean out a single drawer of clothes, renew a few listings on CL, schedule a charity pickup or throwout some old paperwork or magazines in the recycling.  Nothing monumental for sure but it does keep my momentum going and it's the moving forward that really keeps me on task.  On the flip side there will be days where I'm on fire and get tons done, but I try to just be grateful for them and not set them as a standard to live up to everyday.  We'll get to our goal as they say one day at a time.

Weekend Work & Our Start into Downsizing

 

Our storm windows in need of a little TLC.

Snow is supposedly coming to Minnesota today which meant a hustle yesterday to finish any outdoor work yet needing to be done.  Our house is old and still has it's original windows which means swapping out screens for storm windows.  Our storm windows are in need of major work - lots of glazing, sanding and painting.  We were hoping to get to it this summer, but with moving my mother out into her own apartment (she lived with us for the last five years) most of the summer was spent organizing her many, many things.  Her moving out really provided the opportunity for us to move ourselves and get us going on our downsizing goal.  

You see my mother is what I would call a mild hoarder.  When she moved from her large 3 bedroom ranch house to ours my husband filled a 40 foot dumpster with her junk and clutter as well as taking many, many trips to the dump (there was a 3 week timeline to get her out and moved so unfortunately much stuff went into a landfill instead of finding new homes.  It was pretty sad all around.)  But she still had lots of stuff left over and it came in a big plop into our house where she filled the upstairs and about 1/2 our basement with mounds of crazy stuff.  (my first curling iron from 1981 was down there along with 2 sets of hot rollers she hadn't used in decades.)  We felt hostage to all these things and they really kept us from clearing out our own excess stuff.  Heck, there was just no space to work in.  Then my mother would panic if I tried to get rid of anything and would "rescue" items I wanted to sell or donate by keeping them herself.  So, stuff got shuffled around, but not much really left the premises over the last 5 years.

Now, all her stuff is gone and her responsibility to deal with,  leaving us to finally deal with ours.  So, this weekend we put up all the windows even though they look pretty bad.  Dan did get to power washing them over the summer so most of the glazing and much of the paint is missing.  We hope to take them down one at a time and fix and paint them in our basement over the winter months (of which we have 6 here in MN.)  They really look too awful to leave until next summer, and my guess is we'd hear from the city if we did.  Now to find the space to work on them.  Hmm...back to the basement for me.